Teenage Pregnancy Is So Hot Right Now

Yes, little 16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears is preggo. As if the Spears family wasn't disgraced enough, this might send them all back to Kentwood for good. I can't see how Nickelodeon could possibly continue Jamie Lynn's show, "Zoey 101," when their high school starlet is knocked up. In addition, her mom Lynne Spears's book deal with a Christian publishing company is now kaput (as if Lynne should really have been writing a book about parenting in the first place). I can't help but agree a little bit with Michelle Collins's theory that Jamie Lynn is doing this for attention, now that she "sort of has the face of a 42-year-old divorcee whose day job is effing the pool boy at her Pensacola, Florida condominium." However, I like to think that this is the result of Louisiana-style abstinence-only sex education. Let's hope Miley Cyrus has learned the concept of birth control, because tweens today can't live without their Hannah Montana!